卢岩回忆录
本人的回忆录，宗教文化
关键词 Keywords：商朝八年 Eighth Year of Shang Dynasty；武汉 Wuhan；顺皇 White-king Shun；禹皇 White-king Yu；卢堂左 Hall-left Lu（尘香 Dust-scent）；娥黄 Beauty Yellow；女婴 Heroine
目录 Catalog：7. 你是个什么东西？ What creature are you? 8. 拆进入行宫的隧道 Dismantle the tunnel leading to the palace；9. 九五之尊 An Honor of Nine and Five；10. 同志关系 Comrade Relationship；11. 答案就在这些书里 the answer lies in these books
当卢堂左（又名尘香）对龙王发誓之后，大禹坐在了龙王雕像的大腿上。他说：“香我已经燃上了，别浪费了。剩下半炷香的时间，你给我行拜师礼吧！”
卢堂左惊讶地看着大禹，叨咕：“我可真看不明白，你是个什么东西? 你知道不知道？你头顶绿帽子（注7）可不止十顶，一百顶。你头顶的绿帽子都已经把房顶顶漏了，支到天上去了。你还好意思坐在我龙王爷爷的大腿上。”
After Hall-left Lu (aka. Dust-scent) swore an oath to Dragon King, Big Yu sat down on the Dragon King’s statue’s thigh. He said, “I’ve already lit the incense; don’t waste it. You have half a stick of incense left—go ahead and perform the ritual to become my disciple!”
Hall-left Lu stared at Big Yu in astonishment and muttered, “I really can’t figure you out. What kind of creature are you? Do you even realize it? You’ve got more than ten green hats (note 7) on your head—more than a hundred. Those green hats on your head have already punctured the roof and are reaching all the way up to the heavens. And yet you still have the nerve to sit on the thigh of my Dragon King Grandfather.”
注7-1，中国人称呼妻子对丈夫不忠为给丈夫戴绿帽子。
大禹抬头看了看房顶，回答：“房顶没漏哇！说得跟真的似的，谁见着了？”
Note 7-1: In Chinese culture, a wife's infidelity is referred to as "wearing a green hat" on her husband.
Yu looked up at the roof and replied, "The roof isn't leaking! You make it sound so real, but who saw it?"
卢堂左回答：“我见着了，我都被气得造反了！”
大禹问：“你在哪儿见着了！”
卢堂左回答：“我不告诉你！”
Hall-left Lu replied, "I saw it! I was so angry I rebelled!"
Yu asked, "Where did you see it?"
Hall-left Lu replied, "I won't tell you!"
16.3-8 拆进入行宫的隧道 Dismantling the Tunnel
随后大禹去法库县行宫查看了，就发现了那条进入顺皇寝宫的500米长的隧道（参见14.6-3）。大禹把建筑公司的经理和负责防盗墙施工的经理招呼来了。防盗墙施工经理说：“当时尘香更改了设计，后来政府没批准那项设计更改，所以我就按照防盗墙的施工规范做了个活塞堵住了预留孔。”
Yu then went to the migration palace in Faku County to investigate and discovered the 500-meter-long tunnel leading to the Emperor Shun's sleeping quarters (see 14.6-3). Yu then summoned the manager of the construction company and the manager in charge of the anti-theft wall construction. The anti-theft wall construction manager said, "Dust-scent (aka. Hall-left Lu) changed the design at the time, but the government did not approve the design change, so I made a piston to block the reserved hole according to the anti-theft wall construction specifications."
大禹让建筑公司经理和防盗墙施工经理各自用砖摆了防盗墙预留孔和活塞的模型。这俩人的模型一样。大禹判他们俩无罪。
随后大禹查账，把那三个公务员法办了。大禹问建筑公司的经理：“为什么你的工资那么高？”
Big Yu had the construction company manager and the security wall construction manager each create models of the pre-drilled holes and pistons in the security wall using bricks. Their models were identical. Big Yu acquitted them both.
Later, Big Yu checked the accounts and brought the three civil servants to justice. Big Yu asked the construction company manager, "Why is your salary so high?"
建筑公司经理就述说了14.11-4节的事，尘香为了表示道歉，把他的工资增加了两倍。大禹说：“这俩孩子很喜欢那座房子，我把那栋房子终生的使用权送给你。那俩孩子回去的时候，也有个奔头和人气。另外，你和防盗墙施工经理负责把这进入行宫的隧道拆了。你可以把预算做的宽松些。”
The construction company manager recounted the events of section 14.11-4, and Dust-scent, to express his apology, tripled his salary. Big Yu said, “These two children really like that house, so I’m giving you the lifetime right to use it. When they go back, they’ll have something to look forward to and someone to be around. Also, you and the security wall construction manager are responsible for demolishing the tunnel leading to the migration palace. You can be more lenient with the budget.”
16.3-9 九五之尊 An Honor of Nine and Five
大禹回答：“我是九五之尊！”
卢堂左不明白，问：“九五之尊是什么意思？”
Big Yu replied, "I am an Honor of Nine and Five!"
Hall-left Lu not understanding, asked, "What does that mean?"
大禹回答：“九代表缔造中华文明的九位神。他们分别是华国以前的两位国王。”大禹一边说一边指示给卢唐佐看。这是你的外曾祖父，元始天尊。这是你的外祖父，玉皇大帝。缔造中华文明的九位神有两位是以前夏国的国王，一位是你的外曾祖母，蔻珠，另一位是你的外婆绛珠。九位神中有两位曾是龙国的国王。一位是你的曾外祖父熬达，一位是你的外祖母尧皇。九位神中剩余的三位分别是你的龙王爷爷，我，和你妈。”
Big Yu replied, “Nine represents the nine gods who created Chinese civilization. They are two former kings of Hua Kingdom.” As he spoke, Big Yu pointed to the figures on Hall-left Lu's back. “This is your great-grandfather, Primordial Sky Honor. This is your grandfather, Turquoise White-king Great Creator. Two of the nine gods who created Chinese civilization were former kings of Xia Kingdom: your great-grandmother, Kouzhu, and your grandmother, Jiangzhu. Two of the nine gods were former kings of the Dragon Kingdom: your great-grandfather, Aoda, and your grandmother, Emperor Yao. The remaining three of the nine gods are your Dragon King grandfather, me, and your mother.
大禹继续说：“我不但是缔造中华文明的九位神之一。我还是上帝造人的五位必要人物之一。上帝造人这件事中必须有为拯救众生而自愿牺牲生命的上帝。你的外公玉皇大帝就是这种人。他造出了金童和玉女。金童是我。你妈是玉女。你外公因此就成为了上帝。上帝造出了金童，却终生没和金童见过面。上帝是通过使者，燃灯佛，来教金童的。燃灯佛亦做谷神，所以谷神是上帝造人事件中的必要人物之一。上帝造人事件中的第五位神是玉女的导师。她在上帝造人事件中是这事件的守护者。在我们这次上帝造人过程中，这守护任务是由你的两位外婆女娲和西王母，还有你的舅姥姥尧皇三个人来完成的。”
Big Yu continued, “I am not only one of the nine gods who created Chinese civilization, but also one of the five essential figures in God’s creation of man. In God’s creation of man, there must be a God who is willing to sacrifice his life to save all living beings. Your maternal grandfather, Turquoise White-king Great Creator, is such a person. He created a Golden Boy and a Jade Girl. The Golden Boy is me. Your mother is the Jade Girl. Your maternal grandfather thus became God. God created the Golden Boy but never met him in his lifetime. God taught the Golden Boy through the messenger, Lamplighter (Dipankara) Buddha. Lamplighter Buddha is also known as the God of Grain, so the God of Grain is one of the essential figures in God’s creation of man. The fifth God in God’s creation of man is the Jade Girl’s mentor. She is the guardian of this event in God’s creation of man. In our current process of God’s creation of man, this guardianship task is accomplished by your two maternal grandmothers, Nuwa and Western King Mother, and your maternal uncle-grandma, Emperor Yao.”
卢堂左对大禹说：“我发现从我们上船开始到现在，你一直都很高兴！”
大禹回答： “我当然高兴了！我收了个好徒弟，怎么可能不高兴呢！”
卢堂左叨咕：“我可不是好人，我长这么大就没做过几件好事，但我把坏事做绝了！吃喝嫖赌抽，坑绷拐骗偷我都干过！”
大禹回答：“知错能改，善莫大焉！”
Hall-left Lu said to Big Yu, "I've noticed that you've been very happy ever since we boarded the ship!"
Big Yu replied, "Of course I'm happy! I've gained a good disciple, how could I not be happy!"
Hall-left Lu muttered, "I'm not a good person. I've hardly done any good deeds in my life, but I've done all sorts of bad affairs! I've done everything from eating, drinking, whoring, gambling, and smoking, to swindling, kidnapping, and stealing!"
Big Yu replied, “To recognize one’s mistakes and correct them is the greatest virtue of all!”
香烧没了，大禹续香鞠躬时，卢堂左朝着他的屁股磕头拜师！
大禹重新坐在了龙王雕像的大腿上，说道：“列祖列宗都在，这祖庙可不是开玩笑的场所，重新拜！”
卢堂左一边给大禹跪下一边说：“我尘香拜天拜地拜龙王和大禹，您让我拜我就拜！”
As the incense burned out, just as Big Yu was bowing to light a new stick, Hall-left Lu knelt and kowtowed to his backside, asking to be taken on as a disciple!
Big Yu sat back down on the Dragon King’s statue’s thigh and said, “Our ancestors are all present here. This ancestral temple is no place for jesting. Do the ritual again!”
Hall-left Lu knelt before Big Yu and said, “I, Dust-scent, bow to Sky, to Earth, to the Dragon King, and to Big Yu. If you tell me to bow, I will bow!”
16.3-10 同志关系 Comrade Relationship
女婴和娥黄陪着顺皇向回走，女婴问顺皇：“我怎么也想不明白，你和大禹是什么关系？”
顺皇回答：“同志关系！”
Heroine and Beauty Yellow accompanied Emperor Shun back. Heroine asked Emperor Shun: "I just can't understand, what is your relationship with Yu the Great?"
Emperor Shun replied: "Comrade relationships!"
16.3-11 答案就在这些书里 the answer lies in these books
大禹领着卢堂左围着皇宫里的《中华法典》档案馆转圈。三圈过后他们再次来到了档案馆的门口时，卢堂左忍不住地问：“你是不是要领我进这栋楼？我们已经绕着这楼转了三圈了！”
大禹恍然大悟地回答：“对！完全正确！你的问题的答案就在这楼里！”
当大禹和卢堂左进了档案馆，大禹继续领着卢堂左围着书架子转。他们走了三圈后，卢堂左忍不住地问：“你到底让我看哪本书？这么走下去也不是个办法呀！”
Big Yu led Hall-left Lu around the archives of the *Chinese Codex* in the palace. After three laps, when they arrived at the entrance again, Hall-left Lu couldn't help but ask, "Are you going to lead me into this building? We've already circled it three times!"
Big Yu suddenly realized and replied, "Yes! Absolutely right! The answer to your question is in this building!"
Once inside the archives, Big Yu continued leading Hall-left Lu around the bookshelves. After three laps, Hall-left Lu couldn't help but ask, "Which book are you going to let me look at? This isn't going to work!"
大禹回答：“这是《中华法典》的全部档案，你要的答案就在这些书里！”
卢堂左迷惑地问：“这么多书，你看过几本？”
大禹回答：“我都看过几遍了！”
Big Yu replied, "These are the complete archives of 'Chinese Codex’. The answer you seek is in these books!"
Hall-left Lu asked, puzzled, "Of all these books, how many have you read?"
Big Yu replied, "I've read them all several times!"
